Phooey to Samui

Samui is corrupt despite my optimism. Too many people shouting at you all the time everywhere. You have to get way out of the main drag before you can walk down a stretch of road without everyone expecting you to buy things from them. I stopped once, as they wore me down, and was surprised that they don't even haggle like they do in Bangkok.

"How much is this hat?"
"600 Baht" - (12 quid)
"600 Baht too much. 150 Baht better price." (Still too much, but it's hot, and I am haggling"
"No I say 600 Baht, 600 Baht is price. This hat very nice."
"This hat same as hat every other stall."
"600 Baht is price you put hat back go away."
"Ok."

Bought the same hat a mile down the road for 250. A fiver still way too much for a basic sun hat, but you know me and hats. I was mourning the one I left on the top of a lamp in my room in the Marriot.

I packed up my bag, finally said yes to a taxi, and went to the ferry. I got a boat to Koh Tau. Much quieter. Been walking around all morning and nobody has tried to sell me anything. A taxi driver asked me if I wanted a taxi. I said no thanks I am just looking. What you looking for? Coffee. Go down that road. Ok - korp khun crab. Crab.

You assert your gender identity at the end of sentences here in order to be polite. Women say Ka. Men say crab.

Ka is the wily hypnotic sinuous dangerous and charming snake in the jungle book. A crab is a nasty vicious grasping haphazard bully. Go figure.